..... Gee, emotions are such a funny thing aren't they. They bring you happiness and security, yet at the same time they bring you suffering and pain.

Lately, I've been doing some thinking. I'm too tired of all this, so I guess I'm going to give up on her. I'm not suitable, I don't have determination, can't keep a conversation going with her. I'm emotionally insecure. Furthermore, everytime we talk, there's like a wall between us. Each and every single time we'll come to a standstill then there'd be this silence. To top it off, she seems to like someone else. I don't see any way I'd be good enough for anybody, even her.

I'm really really tired of trying. Maybe, in the future things might change for the better or worse if a miracle happens. But that seems like a far fetched dream now, or, maybe I won't be able to forget her. Who knows? All i know that, i'm going to stop trying, stop worrying, go back to the old me who never felt like this and is always cheery. Because... it was all just a crush to begin with, nothing more, nothing less.

Haha. Few more days to Chinese New year, then at long last a NEW fone. yea XD

Anyways. Chinese New Year class decoration judging was today. Lots of people stayed back to help out la, lol. This is what I call Class spirit. yea? First time our class stood so united la. Even though leslie didn't do much (maybe he did do something, i just didn't notice la) he still stayed back, now that's commendable XD.

Our class decoration was spectacular this year la, all thanks to kuku's ideas and his whackiness. He even sacrificed himself and wore the clothes which are oh-so-tight + a black skirt. Haha, droolsworthy yea? LOL. He even, bought half a bucket of rice from his home to school la. Insane. But I really do hope our class wins, however this year, we got serious rivals la. 4F puts in the MOST effort (I know, cuz their class started first and did lots of work) 4H has the most insane decoration i guess, they have really really nice decorations. Ya, tough la. Then our class, even though we put in alot of effort, most of our decorations were last minute, so all our ideas weren't portrayed well. Yea, but we still Pwned. haha.

Judges came, kuku danced, I held Weijie's waist and smelt his butt, gd gawd (and no, it wasn't for a obscene purpose all u dirty minders out there. It was a lion dance, and i was the butt -.-") Then the girls even sang la. It's rare to see 4D girls sing new year songs so enthusiastically, in fact. I guess this is the 1st time! So ya, the judges came, they judged, they laughed, they left. Then we kind of cleaned up and left too ya. Din get to watch memoirs of a geisha la. SOO wanted to watch it today. Oh well.




Oh, on a sidenote. I'm feeling kinda depressed now, so i'm gonna take this chance to try my determination. For tomorrow only, I'm gonna be all angsty and depressed. Maybe it might be for real, mayb i'm only acting la. See if I can actually not laugh for one day yea?

Hah. Went to SP Yesterday, then NYP today.

Basically, I only have one thing to say about each Poly. SP is big, NYP's students are high much better then those we have in our own school la.

At SP, we arrived with a large group and after awhile only remained a few of us left. everyone dispersed la. oh well. Took "Queenie's" tour around the campus la, got lost haha. Saw quite a few courses, Electronic and Computer Engineering still intrests me the most. Haha, my infatuation with PCs eh? XD SP has a nice DBit course too, Diploma In Business IT. Business + IT yea? =P Also saw Carrie Chong. Carrie leh! She's like so much better in person la! Other courses wasn't really intresting la, to me at least it doesn't seem intresting since i already have my eyes on other stuff LoL. Right, thats about all for the SP tour. Oh Oh I Liked SP's mass com, or what did they call it again... some Media thing. XD

Now for NYP.

HAHA i won myself a star and a wrist band thanks to my amazing mouth and eye for detail XD. Self praise myself abit XD haha narcissism. Right. Toured the school of IT, Design, Chemical and Life sciences, Business. NYP is like so much better la. More hip for teens i guess haha. It has a shopping arcade. SHOPPING Arcade LA inclusive of ATM. Unlike SP's single mini shop. The PCs there are like so high-end and they got fast food restaurants, a large food court too. Haha. In the IT school, they had a really cool staff la. We was like walking all over the campus la. Quite big also.

Oh oh, went to orchard today after NYP. Din buy anything in fact, i got my feet sore and lotsa fats burnt. lOl. =P. I think i lost 5kg of fats la! XD XD XD Since these few days go poly walk walk walk till feet sore. Must have lost lots of weight haha.

You know. It's been a long time since I post la. Right, everybody knows that. Okay.
Now since this is a revival post. I decided to post something outta de ordinary.

You know. I've been wondering what the world would be if I sorta disappeared from it. You know, disappearing from people's lives. Yea.

1. The World's resources meant for my use in the future is so gonna be saved, and it can be used to fed more needy people.

2. Singapore would have a lessened burden of 80.6kg and the possibility of Singapore Sinking would be lowered.

3. People would not have to suffer the wrath of my awesome lame jokes. HAHA.

4. People would not have to lose self confidence thanks to my "shooting" skills.

5. The World would most probably have more anger and hate since there's no other "Pacifist" like me. XD

6. Friend's Lives would be so darn freaking dull.

7. One more less person to bully to raise self confidence.

8. Loss of Comedic relief which can only come from me.

9. There'd be one less "talented" singer in this world. (HAHAHA I ADMIT I'm TALENTED!)

10. One more less person to be infected by diseases and in turn infect others.

Hah. there's the top 10 things which would happen. Imaginative eh?

Oh. and on a sidenote. I'm not really seriously thinking about disappearing infact, I do so not condone the act of disappearing without informing ME. Yea. This is just sort of to revive the blog.